Aftermath

     I’m going insane.




     That isn’t an aberration; it’s simply normal. Sages say it’s typical for people emotionally active to feel like being on the verge of breaking down.

     When our relationship was shattered after hitting the rocky shore from the precipice above, I knew I had to pick up all the pieces together and try my best to put all of them back – one by one. Picking up a piece of broken vessel requires expertise, or else your hands would end up bloodied by gashes from the sharp edges of the vessel fragments. Since I’m not an expert myself, my hands were already a bloody mess after just picking a handful of pieces. Yes, I must admit: I’m not an expert in handling relationships. I used to be a chauvinistic pig before, making it easier for you to understand my acknowledgment. I never really was the type of man you would want handling a delicate situation in a certain relationship; I’d simply go away.

     This time, however, I finally grasped what my lady means to me – the most integral part of my world after God and my family. I fully understood it in the way that I knew I had to make amends and start from the bottom, or else I’d have nowhere to turn to. I chose this world, and I love it so much I’ll lose my mind if she goes away.

     And that’s where the insanity comes into play.

     Despite being wounded, my hands simply wouldn’t give up on trying to put everything back, even though the sun has started to set. Nighttime will soon follow, and I know that without light it would be impossible for me to do what I have to. I can’t carry the vessel with me; home is about a mile away, and the fragility of the vessel couldn’t stand other conditions as well. If I leave it broken overnight and come back tomorrow, someone else may come and fix it before I do, making the vessel his property. I’ve spent my life looking for the right, fragile vessel, only to carelessly drop it from the cliff above. Now I’m losing my mind as I try my best to glue them all back again.

     Nighttime is quickly approaching. God knows I need all the help I could get. Admittedly, I’m tiring up; I’m never used to doing this, but now I know I have to. This is for my long-term happiness.



     Yes, you’ve read perfectly, as stated above: I’m going insane.